My wife just texted me some old pictures of us, with the caption "you didn't look miserable here". I responded that I wasn't miserable then, and she then proceeded to chastise me for telling her that I was miserable for years.
For those of you following my sitch, she insists that those words are what caused her to have the affair. In reality, the reason I made the comment was because we were arguing all the time, I felt unappreciated, and I was trying to tell her that we were both unhappy and needed to change. She instead convinced herself that I didn't love her anymore and went looking elsewhere. Keep in mind that we had never fought before or had that sort of conversation.
Anyway, I validated her feelings and told her that it must have been very hurtful for her. I did not beg or grovel or even mention our marriage, other than telling her that I should have treated her better.
Her last comment was that she still has my picture in her office and hasn't told anyone about the affair or divorce because she feels like a failure. Of course, that statement is not true, as she has indeed told people at work that I was horrible and she was divorcing me.
So...how should I have handled this? Suggestions? Thoughts?
Me M51 WW F46 T 17 yrs M 16 yrs 9 children D29 D27 D26 S24 S24 S19 S19 niece18 S17 8 grandchildren ILYBINILWY: 12/15/14 I discover PA 12/31/14 She files D: 1/9/15 She moves out 3/2/15 D papers served 3/18/15
