Back again, advice needed..

[Tulo]

Hey Tulo, just catching up on your sitch.

If you can please throw some info on your profile so we can get a sense of age, time together, status, etc.

OK, I have to ask a question. I promise I'm not judging. Just really curious. You said you tried DR in your first M, then bad things happened, and you finally had to leave because you didn't love him, and you couldn't respect a man that didn't act like a man.

Would you make the same decision again?

Hey you!

1. I will try to get that profile thing going, haven't really gotten the hang of this forum yet.. I made a quick summary at the end of my last entry until I find what I need to do. Unfortunately a bit challenged when it comes to forums, but I'll figure it out.

2. Yes, I would make the same thing again when it comes to that situation. The DB worked, but when he came back after leaving me and hooking up with an ex for months, and I saw that he just thought it was ok with more of the same I couldn't do it. The problem was that he had 2 kids that he simply wouldn't step up for, not emotionally or financially, but just put all that on me and even stopped paying mortgage for our house. I payed for more or less all of our expenses, food, clothes, car, house and he just sat in his studio playing his guitar hoping to be a rock star. No, he didn't make it, if you wondered..

He put it all on my shoulders, and even though he came back and swore he loved me, I just felt that either he wanted to be a part of our family, both emotionally and financially or he didn't. When he refused to change and be a father to his kids and at least an equal provider for our family, I said goodbye. I felt I needn't pay for a man any more. I would never have left if I had thought that he could care for anyone but himself. In the end I understood that not me, not the kids, nothing was important to him, but HIM!

So now this time around, I had a man I thought was the real deal, that I could pamper with love, good food, fun times and great sex and hopefully get something lasting back. But l still somehow come up short. And I'm back to wanting to have a relationship that is true and long lasting.

Seems very tricky for me indeed..

Thanks for your reply, and I think your advice on taking it slow was very good. It just seems I've run out of time to do that.