Bob - I guess you are right, you make perfect sense. It is all so unclear right now. It is getting to me since I like to resolve stuff.
I called to get an appointment for a blood test. In the past, once going through some stress (like in college), my sugar level was very low and I was always tired and dizzy. Recently I took a Vitamin D supplement (8000 per pill) to make up for my deficiency. For some reason my body uses it all.
Toots - it is hard, isn't it? If at least we could just ignore it for some time and then in some given day look at it again and then try to resolve it. I am trying my best, I guess when H is too far for too long, I go back into my fear, insecurities and disillusions.
Jim - You are right on... "Because you love the fool" Yes, I still love that dog and want to break his nose with a big punch. I have all the reasons to just forget him, and yet here I am, missing him.
And you are right again... who knows what is going on in his head and in his heart. Last time we talked, he said that he thinks about us, his family every single day. That there is not one day that goes by that he does not think a lot about his sitch.
He even said that he has been thinking about our M, about us and what direction he must go from now on, and then said that he is very confused right now.
So, I guess I need to wait and see what happens and try to make the most of my own life.
We will be better tomorrow. Did you guys see the movie Frida? The story of a Mexican painter. I am Frida with a lot of pain.
Thanks you all for your kind words, it makes a big difference to have someone to share the bad days (and good ones too).
