Well, I now have confirmation of OW. One of my friends saw them out together last week. I know I shouldn't have said anything, but I did. At first he played dumb, then tried to deflect by questioning my motives in asking, then said that they were just friends hanging out. Then he goes into that fact that he hasn't changed his mind about us getting a divorce (so I guess then it's ok to date someone else?) and that all I've ever tried to do is manipulate and control him.
Then he again asked about getting the house appraised and splitting the assets. I told him that he wanted the divorce so he could figure it out. Then he said I have mentioned wanting out previously and now I don't want a divorce? I said that I have been fighting for our marriage since October and the whole time he had just been placating me by saying he was confused and that him moving out was only "temporary" but he knew all along what he wanted. Then he said.....that he had to move out because he was CONCERNED FOR HIS SAFETY! WTF? He said that he was scared because I had a gun (which he told me at one point during our in house separation that he didn't want it in the house so I locked it in the glove box of my car). I have done a lot of things, but I have NEVER threatened him with violence in any way or mentioned the gun or alluded to it in fights or anything of that nature.
I mean no wonder he thinks it's ok for him to divorce me, he is telling himself that I was going to harm him. I mean really?!
I am so not detached, I'm horrible at DBing, every interaction we have just reinforces his desire to get a divorce. I'm not sure there is any hope for our marriage.
Me:36 H: 29 T: 4 years M: 2 years No kids In-house sep 10/4/14 H moved out 1/2/15 Talk of D 4/9/15
"She's standing on a line between giving up and seeing how much more she can take" John Mayer
