Do not allow any changes to the schedule. D7 was given a choice because you allowed it, because your STBX assumed that you would allow it. I don't care if it was late, if you start introducing this kind of flexibility, the whole thing becomes a mess. With me, the home rules are as reliable as the laws of physics. They apply all the time, no negotiation, no doubt. This is how we end up planning around them. So your STBX could have prepared the car before the end of the game to leave earlier. He could consider adjusting the schedule so that these things would not happen. But he could not assume that things can be adjusted at the last minute.
By the way, it may sound harsh, but it's actually a much gentler approach in the long run because you avoid all these confrontations, the compromises that are frustrating or rejected.
But Mozza, life is about compromise. It's about frustration and rejection and getting over it. It's about tolerance and compassion and flexibility. That's what makes us humans.
I agree that it's best to keep to a consistent schedule, but sometimes the best interest of the child has to override that. If my H says, can you switch with me and I say no, then he does what he wants anyway and gets a babysitter or pawns her off on a friend. And if I truly had something else to do, then fine, but if I'm refusing to switch just to be a hard *ss, then, well, that's not in the best interest of my kid. I'd prefer she be with me, and she'd prefer to be here.
I respect that a completely rigid schedule works for you, Mozza. I'm just offering another viewpoint.
