I do have a thread in the newcomers forum. However, I can certainly post my story in the MLC forum.
I get what you are saying about the chores. It makes complete sense. But my concern is this: Her reasons for no longer loving me and being done is that while I was depressed I ignored my responsibility as both husband and father. So your advice on the kids is spot on and I am actively doing that. However, she also viewed my lack of availability and assistance with domestic responsibility as a major issue as well. For my particular case, I believe that if I am not showing her through action on both the father and the responsible and helpful husband end that it could backfire on me and will only validate her reasoning for wanting to divorce.
Her gripe being that I abandoned her and the kids tells me that my 180 needs to be total focus on being the best and most involved father I can be and also just do what needs to be done around my house when I am there. That would be the true 180 from what I was when I was depressed and that is what the real me was before my depression.
Of course, I need to be doing this while giving her space and not pursuing her in terms of talking about us.
It's a delicate balance in my case because if I just "let things alone and let her do everything on her own" than I am not doing a 180. I am actually doing one of the things that has made her feel that she is done with me.
