TenBook thanks for following along and your words of encouragement. Yesterday was a tough day, it's a relief to hear from someone that's been there.
I have no doubt that the EA is (or was) also a PA. I don't know if either is still going on although I find it hard to believe the EA isn't as they are co-workers.
Yes, you are right, she has all of the control right now and probably those overtures came last week because I implemented the 180's and at least gave the illusion that I was taking control over myself. Then, I fell for her bait when she said she loved me. Ironically, the first time she said it was last Thursday and I thought she was talking to the D, so I ignored it, then she said it emphatically the next day. If/when she says it again, I will do a better job with boundaries and not take the bait.
I have a question about setting up boundaries with the EA/PA. Sandie's 180 rules say to..
7. Do not ask for reassurances (That is showing neediness and being clingy.) Show self-respect and self confidence.
20. All questions about marriage should be put on hold, until your spouse wants to talk about it (which may be a while) so this takes patient on your behalf.
If I bring up a conversation now about the EA/PA in order to set boundaries, doesn't that fly in the face of the 180's, which seem to just "act as if" I am moving on.
