Coming Home

[mleigh4]

Cali. Can you remember what it was that made your wife feel you were moving on? Oh, and I make a mean rack of ribs if you are ever in the garlic capital!

We are both great mindreaders, you have been accused of it many times If anyone was to ask me, what do I think is going through H's mind, I would say he sees me moving farther and farther away. To a point where I have almost started feeling.......cold to him. At pick up and drop off of S, I have kept things quick and short, no small talk for me! I just have not felt like sharing anything with him lately, I feel very distant from him. But I realized, maybe I am being a little too cold. So when I picked S on Friday, I made a point to chit chat a little. I pointed out his new work truck that he got a couple of weeks ago, he gave me a full tour. I touched his arm where he had some recent scars, he told me the whole story of what happened. I even put down some bricks to hold the base of his canopy because it was really windy. Lol, I am on a roll here with this home improvement stuff.

Anyway, I just get this feeling, mind reading, that he is really lonely right now. But I feel it is a part of the journey and that I need to stay out of the way. My H has always dealt with depression and I do believe he is working through it and feels it is better he do it away from us. I am not saying his intent is to do this for me or our family, I just think he is really lost right now, and that he has been fighting and trying to escape these feelings for a really long time.

My gut so far is not sensing OW, and for whatever reason I hope my gut is right. But I also know anything is possible, however I am done wasting my energy on that fear. I figure if it comes to be, I will deal with it then.

Thanks for your support. I am enjoying life and looking forward to our good weather.