Question - is your name on the deed or is it only her name? If only her name she can kick you out legally (sorry). I would scout out close studio apartments just in case.
If your name is on the deed - I would move her stuff out of the marital bedroom to the couch or another room. Is that why you are still living together? If so, they must be hard.
If both of your names are on the deed - don't leave the home try to get her to leave.
Try to be distant but cordial and it sounds like you are doing a good job at that. Don't do her any favors shopping or picking up any legal docs -let her do it.
Spend as much time with your boys as possible - be gone from the house as much as possible. Don't enable her in any way as she is a ww.
