"but when we talk we hold hands. It makes it more emotional and harder for him to lie"

Don't be to sure of that. The very nature of an affair is a lie, people have affairs all the time and lie to their spouse that they are still being intimate with. So, while it may be harder for you to lie because of the connection, that is not necessarily the truth for him. Remember no expectations!

Me-44 (45)
H- 50 (51)
M-'96

S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)

BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas)
home Oct(sep rooms)
(EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed)
insists wants D through July 2015
no more talk of D since