Well...I think I do Understand what detachment is and what benefits it will bring. How to fully implement this, well that is where I have fallen short.
I have come to a conclusion that I am in a codependent marriage. I try to meet my wife's needs to gain affection, right? The anxiety the self esteem problems are better...but am unjust tricking myself into feeling better about doing these things because it is for mybbenefit. am I truly giving of myself because it is an act of love. I think a lot of times it is true. Sometimes I feel like I am still doing things to curry affection and elicit an affectionate reaction.
This is my new focus. How do I break free of this cycle. I went out for the afternoon yesterday and enjoyed the time with my new gaming group... But I had more than a twinge of regret for being there. This a real problem. After wards I came home we for dressed up nice and went on a outing with some of the gals and their husband's. It was fun. This group is 15-20 years older than us, bit was still cool. The guys talked about dumb jobs we've had and all the different shows we've been to. Once the show was underway, a couple of the girls switched spots and wife ended up next to me. We had a great time. (I had a great time, she said she had a great time)
What are good suggestions for book on codependency and breaking the cycle???, This will be something I need to address during my future IC sessions. Was looking at codependency no more?
