Love you with all my heart, please forgive me for doing this. Was sick for the whole week, got a bug or something. Had fever and was very weak. I think it's finally catching up with me and my body is taking the it hard.
I feel a little better. Did it all I need to do during the week but resign from any GAL for the weekend. It is just too much to handle right now.
I am at work now. I want to catch up with all the paperwork and have a nice week without too much stress.
Work has been good, spoke w/my director and the support is so appreciated. I have a green light from everyone now to get my Orthotic certificate and then I will be able to see my own patients. Feel really good about it.
Next Thursday will be my last class for the financial class I have been doing. Really good for me, learned a lot and will be able to apply some of the stuff towards my own financials.
My boys are good. Hurting with the total absence of their father. I really want to see to good side of him, but when I hear my kids comments of how it is not having a father, I can't denied that he loses a lot in my eyes.
My father was an in an off alcohol, but he was a present father, he gave us the love he knew how, but he was there. We had times of sadness, fight, but we also have many moments of happiness, laughter, enjoyment, respect, he wants us to be happy. I tough he was not the best father, but now I see that he was not so bad and my kids have the bad one.
It's hurting me a lot, by one hand I love this man and would like the opportunity to make a new life beside him, by other hand he is an empty jar, he left his family, does not have any respect or value for it, uses it as he wants and pleases, and then he is off again. He is a poor person in spirit and character right now. My heart is divided, I can't be so irresponsible, I am crazy but I know what is family.
So I will work some more now, I will try to catch up on everyone's thread asap. Love you all with all my heart and miss you all.
