Feeling lost

[jessm15]

Haven't posted in a while so thought that I would post a little update.

It's been a crazy few weeks. My sister was in hospital, both of my kids have been sick and someone rear-ended me everyone is okay but my car, not so much

I feel like I am in limbo at the moment. Ex has the best of both worlds, comes home and stays the night whenever he misses the kids and then whenever he's tired or stressed he sleeps at his parents.

He's probably staying at home 3 nights a week, in our bed.

I've had moments where I have told him to leave and that he can't stay over anymore but then I always give in. Thinking that it's better to keep him close?

I don't text or call him first. Have been going to the gym and catching up with old friends so I definitely feel like I'm in a better place. I'm not crying in the bathroom everyday so that's something!

I have not asked anything about our R I have just stayed quiet and just been watching what he does. Sometimes he will finish work, come home, eat dinner with us, we will watch a movie then go to bed- like everything is normal. Other nights he just won't come home.

I was driving myself crazy wondering what he was thinking about our R seeing as I hadn't asked in weeks so I text and asked him if he was going to come him permanently?
This was his reply; I don't know at the moment, I know it's unfair on you not getting a legit answer out of me but my heads a mess, I miss being at home but I get stressed and you make me angry.

I didn't even know what to reply to that! "I get stressed" YEAH, toddlers are stressful!

I really need some advice I am lost as to what I should do. My friends say to kick him out and sell the house.

Should I just continue as I have been? No R talk. Not contacting him first. GAL.

The main thing I need advice on is do I just let him keep coming home and staying whenever he decides he wants to or do I need to tell him he can't stay he until he commits to the R?

I appreciate any replies thank you.