When is kindness enough?

[Ripe]

I already have my next GAL activity planned.
I have just registered for a one month online meditation course, starting 1st May.
My instantaneous thought was: shall I tell my W?
Of course I wanted to.
That is everything I want: to spend time with her, to make her happy, to please her. Most probably she would like the course.
My feelings don’t matter, I then thought.
And I realised I was going down through cheeseless tunnels.
My motives for asking her to participate with me are not pure, honest or altruistic.
I would be waiting for a “thank you”, for her to realise how good a husband I am, for her to start touching me again.
I would not be doing that disinterestedly, just because it would give me pleasure to share some moments with her.
I would be expecting something in return. I would be giving to get.
And for that I have decided not to tell her.

Am I over-analysing this too much?
Am I going crazy?