Alpha Step At A Time #5

[alpha99]

Hi all,

I had a great time this evening. It was a date, it went really well (at least I thought so), and I'd like to do it again. I did briefly explain sitch. I could see a reaction on her face of course but she said anyone our age is going to have some sort of baggage. I don't know if it will go anywhere but I'd at least like to see her again.

Complex, maybe you're right. I think though sometimes a long post on here only comprises passing thoughts in my head. My M as it stands is over. Whilst it's not what I ever intended that's where I am. I feel ready to move on.

Twinmom, I understand what you're saying completely. I respect W for the job she is doing with the kids but I don't agree with elements of how she is doing it. I don't see it as being better so much, more simply as basic right and wrong. MIL in the case you mentioned was more dismissive in tone than I was. At this point my children's welfare is my main concern, just them being happy. I don't think I spoil the kids at all. Theyve been on a ton of holidays in recent years. The most recent one didn't happen because of sitch, and so an ice cream in the park isn't overdoing it in my eyes as a replacement. Now they're back at school again my time with them is again more functional than too much fun.

Logically dating is surely not conducive to sorting out M. If I thought there was a chance to sort things out then maybe I'd have stayed clear of dating. I don't think there is any chance anymore though. I hope I'm wise enough to see that my own growth shouldn't stop because of some attention. I will continue to be independent. I think of the WAW video that says your husband has being going to school on your marriage and will make someone else a great husband. I would never make the same R mistakes as I have previously. I wouldn't use somebody as a crutch. If anything happens with my date tonight, it will happen SLOWLY. There will be no headlong rush into replacing what I had previously.

I do have a good clear mind now on how I want to proceed.