Mozza, No one is questioning detachment. Bulldog is also M not a W. Bulldog is blatantly calling out that the current path will not work... "In your situation I don't buy the persuer distancer concept and line of thinking that by detaching your wife is more likely to pursue you. She's got her own agenda." He is reinforcing comments made early on about an A.
Sometimes you can do everything "right" and still not stop a divorce. And other times you can do everything "wrong" and save your marriage.
It takes two to make a marriage and both of those involved have "free choice".
There also does not need to be an active affair to have infidelity. Sometimes it can be a fantasy or a character in a book.
I think all you can do is to get on living your life, and become that person that only a fool would leave. Then you can't lose!
