My First Break, Light Shines Yonder

[Zues126]

First, I just posted on Ten's thread, check it out

OK- easy to overthink this question so I will.

Obviously you don't want to be pursuing.
You don't want to allow her to treat you poorly and respond positively.
You don't want to always respond immediately.
You don't want to say too much as we know she'll find a way to negatively interpret almost anything

You do want to appear mature and calm
You do want to showcase your true self
You do want to allow her to continue to communicate with you


I believe you should operate with the following rules:

-Don't reply when she's rude. Do reply when she's courteous.

-Be brief in your replies.

-Use the 80% rule. Respond with 80% of the warmth she extends. (let her lead on this, don't crowd her, let her come to you)

-OK to reply quickly some of the time, just not every time. I wouldn't wait all of the time because then it looks like you're playing games.


Finally- don't read too much into it. My WAW sent me increasingly nice emails the entire time she was with OM, then talked about reconciliation, then she 180'd and pulled away hard, never looking back since.

So NO EXPECTATIONS. I can't predict the future but I doubt things are just going to warm up little by little and start a fire again. Reality is it could be a year of moving on, then a rock bottom, then another year passing, then her looking you up when the dust has settled. Or she might never look back. Or she will get warm, then pull away again. Yes, it's possible it just falls back together, but honestly you'll drive yourself crazy and only hurt your chances by reattaching. So follow that plan, and let it go.