Nole, thanks for posting again. I am really sorry you're having a tough time. Yes, we have some clue how you feel but you're right, it doesn't change how devastating it feels.
I DO have children with WAW and can't comment on that piece. What I will say is what I tell my sales people: Focus on RESULTS you CAN'T control and you will feel terrified and helpless. Focus on BEHAVIOR you CAN control and you will start to feel confident and strong.
Things you can't control: What your WAS is thinking, whether he notices your changes, whether he is having 2nd thoughts, etc.
Things you CAN control: What you're doing for personal growth, your 180s, your GAL activities, your self care.
It's totally normal and ok to spend a little time wondering about WAS. You need to go through that for a bit so your mind can calm down and see it doesn't help you much. But when you feel too much pain, please go back to yourself, and taking care of yourself. You don't deserve to hurt.
So- my challenge to you would be to reread your last two posts and see how much of that you can control. Now make another post and talk about what you're doing this week that you can. I can't promise you'll feel better (because you can't control feelings directly ) but you will have done what you could!
Take care and keep posting!
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
) but you will have done what you could!