Confirming an A through intel does change the overall DB strategy. You only need to look in Rubicon's situation to see what we're advising him in respect to his W's affair with the OM.
Rubicon is killing it by implementing all the techniques we urge that all LBH's take that communicates to wives that living in an open marriage isn't an OPTION and shows incredible disrespect for you as a husband.
FYI...people who engage in covert A's don't bring it up or disclose it at all. EVER. They like to keep it secret so they can have it both ways: OP on the side while having the benefits of a spouse w/ family. That's called cake-eating.
You brought up snooping which is a valid point. Snooping and gathering intel are two separate matters. Gathering intel is to confirm and verify if there's an affair or a continuation of an affair. Snooping is constant checking on the spouse's activities that are of no consequence such as looking at their FB, texts, YouTube, etc which only brings painful emotions to you.
Have you read Sandi's threads for LBHs? That would be a good read for you.
