Maybell XXXIV: Expecto Patronum!

[Maybell]

I had a fantastic weekend. Really great. Kids were with their dad and everything I did this weekend was with lovely encouraging friends.

Kids came home clearly having missed me and home a ton. STBX stuck around for about an hour and a half packing the last of his cr... Stuff to take back to his apartment. I avoided him completely.

The boys were clinging to me, kissing me, hugging me even while he was there. Given they were only gone literally 48 hours I'm not sure what that was about. It was excessive compared to other weekends.

D12 was terribly surly, but spent a couple of hours clearing up her room for the house to sell. After I got the boys to bed she curled up in my lap and apologized very nicely and said sadly that she doesn't want to sell the house. I was really honest with her. Said I don't want to either but that these were consequences her dad had chosen for us. That this is why it's important to honor your commitments -- because it really impacts people when you don't and it's not fair or kind to make other people suffer for ones own lack of commitment. I said that her dad had broken my heart but that if I had to choose between never getting my heart broken and not having her and her brothers or having my heart broken and having the three of them in my life, that I would choose a broken heart and three great kids.

She said "we gave you something to live for."

I said, "well, I know you remember what I was like when Dad first left. It's not that you gave me something to live for, but you guys were an important reason why I knew I had to learn to be happy again."

Then I told her every person is responsible for their own happiness, but they couldn't seek it at anyone else's expense. That you must find your happiness in a way that does not harm others.

I don't know how much of that she understood. she did very greatly relax in my lap as I was telling her all that so I know it mattered to her. I hope she actually heard what I meant.