We both know that you h should change his exemptions so that he doesn't have to pay so much at the end of the year. Ten exemptions is a lot to claim. He needs to drop it down to just one or two. He will then have funds coming out for his taxes during the year and it won't bite him as badly at the end of the year. He sounds like he's really worried now about his tax filing, as well he should be. He's got a lot to straighten out and hopefully the IRS will not bring you into the mess.

There are three ideas that come to my mind: 1) he didn't think when he filed and just went w/whatever the preparer suggested; or 2)he considers himself single (mlc land) even though you two are still living under the same roof; and 3) he didn't want you to know what he was doing. Any way you slice it, it is going to come back to bite him.

Do you need a larger home or is this a dream of his? Does he not like the home or the area?

Try to stay on track and allow him to stew over his mess. He's going to want to talk to you about it...but there's nothing you can do for him.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.