I read through your thread, and the folks who have replied to you have given good advice. I know it's hard, but you have to let go. You can only work on you, and by doing that, you may draw her back to you. She has things of her own to work out, and you can't really help her with that. Back off, respect it, and use the time to reflect and grow.
A basic principle of DB is to work on yourself, better yourself, in order to be the best "you" that you can be. Become someone only a fool would leave. It may bring your W around, it may not. But, if you truly better yourself, in the end, you will be okay either way.
Detach! Detach! Detach! It is going to be the hardest step, and your ability to do it will cycle, until you really start to be okay with it. GAL activities will help as well.
Don't let your feelings cloud your mind. It will happen often, but you need to think things through to determine the true source. You need that logic to help you through this.
Example: My wife is in an active EA/PA with a coworker, our son has very likely already met this "friend", and it kills me that she thinks that is OK. But, logic dictates that I need to set a boundary for that, even though my heart tells me I should plead with her not to do it. I have to let logic rule that decision, because she does not care what is in my heart at the moment.
You have to begin to command respect and not be a doormat for her wishy-washy "unsure" statements. She is trying to keep you hooked, and so far, she has been successful. Don't let it continue to be that way.
Me: 30, W: 29 S: 4 T: 14 M: 5 BD: March, 2015, ILYBNILWY, IDLY, Need Space OM, EA/PA Discovered (drunken kissing, she says she stopped there? NOPE!): March 2015 S: April 25th, 2015
