Getting Stronger

[HeavyD]

Purchased the tickets to Disney - GAL weekend here we come!

[Wonka]

Hey...make friends with Goofy! Way to go, girl!

[Elly4]

Have a ball!!!

[HeavyD]

I intend to.

Hey I just finished reading the Solo Partner. I am having trouble figuring out if I am the Pursuerer or Distancer. I have a bit of both. I think however in this situation, i am the pursurer, so that's it - no more pursuit!

He gave a really good explanation of the dynamic and how to stop it and how dysfunctional it all is. It is the bases for DB in my opinion. GAL is the letting go of the pursuit which makes you more attractive. If the wayward mate takes notice good, if not, well you are in a better place for it.

A highly recommended read!

[HeavyD]

Actual question here:

When does the spew end? This has been going on now about 7 months and she is STILL ANGRY all the time at me. I frankly am over it and just walk away or hang up.

Is there an end to this or this the new normal?

Good Lord!

[T384]

Who knows? Not your problem to fix it ... Just stay the course and take the higher road.

If you really place boundaries eventually she will stop trying to push your buttons.

[HeavyD]

My boundry is that when she becomes disrespectful to me,

I will:

hang up the phone gently
don't respond to texts
walk away calmly
drive away calmly

I just keep thinking that there must be a bottom to this pit of spew and spittle. Apparently not - LOL

[Elly4]

Is that how you have always handled her spew? Isn't this a relatively new boundary for you? If it is, I'd expect a few more months of her testing the boundary unfortunately.

[HeavyD]

Yes unfortunately this is relatively new - since bomb drop.

Sounds like I will have to endure it forr a while longer?!? Urgh!

I will keep my boundary in place.

[Elly4]

You'll get through it because we will support your efforts on here.