Sandi, I absolutely can hang with it! My only worry is that she will not be able to, and will file for D, perhaps immediately, perhaps later. I know I have to stop projecting those feelings, and I have been getting better... The hardest part has been being in the same house for the past 6 weeks after BD, and riding the rollercoaster in her presence.
Great! Then roll up your sleeves b/c you have a lot of work ahead.
I see a lot of men fall into the fear trap. They are so afraid of the W filing for D that it paralyzes them. Once you step off in that trap, it gets harder. You basically have to gnaw your out of it, which a painful way to go.
Do not be afraid of what she "may" do. You'll become a prisoner to that way of thinking. She may, in fact, D you. But what's to say the two of you won't get back together later? The girl put up with a lot of cr@p and now she figure's she is through with it and wants some happiness.
You will not be able to talk your way out of this situation, so don't even try to convince her things will change if she will give you another chance. It's going to take time to prove yourself. The final results of your changes will be what affects her feelings.
You should expect something else. When she sees you making all these positive changes in your life, it may really tick her off. No doubt, she won't believe your changes are real or that they will stick. That's why time has to prove it out. She's not going to hang on to see how it goes, b/c she's done with the whole thing.......so don't go getting all upset when you don't see her trying to work with you to save the M. I hope you'll take this as warning, you cannot measure your progress by how she responds....not as long as she has the heart of a WAW.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
