Thank you for believing in me. Your story/advice is incredibly encouraging.
This afternoon, I suspended my W cellphone service. I came home early from work and calmly told her what I decided to do and why (boundaries). She became very angry, accusing me of being controlling, manipulative, etc. She said she hates me and wishes we never married. I remained calm throughout. She Said that it was "our" money and stated that I couldn't do what I did. My reply... "It's family money to be used for our family needs, not for you to blatantly disrespect all of us by having an affair".
I'll post more about our conversation a little later. She talked about leaving, taking the kids, not having any money of her own, etc.
Perfectly stated, and well-done, Rubi. I commend you -- some wallow in fear for MONTHS before doing the very simple (but NOT easy) step that you just took today. Many NEVER do it.
btw, everything she said is SCRIPT. We all could have written it for her ahead of time (and it looks like someone -- I think it was Train -- even pretty much did!). The fact is, you could have done nothing (horrible move, for all the reasons stated over the past 24 hours), or you could have secretly messed with the router settings and blocked her IP address or something, which is cowardly and weaselly. What you did instead was look her straight in the eye and calmly tell her what you did, and why. And your reasons were in the best interests of the family.
Again, WELL DONE.
Let her stew. If she continues to attack you over it, just again say what you said originally -- even word-for-word. No more. Throw in a "I'm sorry you feel that way," and move on. If she gets downright rude, obscene or disrespectful, end the conversation.
