I have been delaying taking any action with the texting/calls. I thought I should be focusing on myself and ignoring the affair. I thought that setting boundaries would be perceived as pressure her and focusing on the affair. I will have the boundaries conversation tonight! Thank you again!
Thoughts about contacting the OM?
Any other advice is appreciated.
Even if you ignore the affair (advice that I don't agree with), that doesn't mean you have to ignore every aspect of it. The thought is, to control the things that you can control, and to lay out (and learn to enforce) your own healthy boundaries.
It's more of a "you're free to do what you want, you're a grown woman, but I won't live in an open marriage" thing. Or a "but I won't have inappropriate text messages be sent in front of my face, that's incredibly disrespectful to me, to our marriage and to our family. If you can't control yourself, I'd ask that you take that outside."
Who pays for her cellphone service?
NO, do not talk to the OM. What, to ask him to stop the affair? What makes you think that a dishonorable man (by definition, a PREDATOR actually) would do the honorable thing? It will only make you look weak and the two of them will have a good laugh over it.
