Zelda - almost there

[Vanilla]

Z

The difference now is that you broke the cycle. You applied an intervention and H still wants the old pattern.

H needs the old pattern. Look Z is a strong person, and I am stronger than Z. That makes me an amazingly wonderful person. So H wants and needs to rinse and repeat. Z does not.

Z you are brave as brave as Gg. Facing up to and acknowledging this is a really big change.

I really want Z to put her energy into Z, TLC. Real TLC extreme self care. Z, your journey and your enormous courage is very important here on the board. Abuse in various forms should be voiced. None of this is your issue in H, you did not cause it, you can't control it and you can't cure it. It's H and his crappola to sort. Like waywardness this one is a deal breaker for an M. With physical abuse I say get safe.

I for one am relived that you can not now unknow, you can detach and observe.

Gg is much further along the journey than me, and both of you have had this for much longer in your life than I have. So I take Gg and what she says very seriously, when I first arrived Gg was an early visitor and in her very tell it like it is said "V that is abuse, my H was like that with me". I could then never not know.

So Z you can still stand for your M for yourself. If H will make the changes then it is possible, but takes a long time and a lot of work.

V