Job and Beatrice -- you are both correct. There are some things that we have agreed that I will take from the house. My name is on the house -- but only at a very small % so she is buying me out (and is planning to be able to do that by the end of May, beginning of June) -- I definitely cannot afford to buy her out of her % of the house.
I wish it were as easy as making her leave since all of this is her choice -- but that won't happen without a huge miracle (like her losing her job which would turn a lot of stuff upside down in both of our lives). I think the best thing at this point -- barring a huge miracle -- is just for me to get out of the way and let her live this reality.
I do believe she is going to wake up and realize that it isn't what she wants -- I do believe she is going to wake up and realize she made a huge mistake and that she really does love me -- but I don't believe that she is going to wake up while I am still here. In fact, there were a couple of things said and done this morning that give me the impression that she is struggling with this decision -- like a part of her already knows this isn't really what she wants, but she's already made up her mind and can't or won't consider the option of backing out of things with OW or trying to reconcile with me right now. (Almost like a pride issue of "what will people think if I change my mind on all of this so suddenly right now?" combined with a lot of confusion complicated by the stress of a lot of things falling apart in her life and a lack of sleep related to all of the above.) Of course, God could have other plans in that regard and maybe she will wake up before things go much farther... But I can't assume that is going to happen.
Having said all of that... I do suspect that the rush to do all of this is because she may be getting pressure from the OW. However, only God knows what is going on in OW's heart and head... I can't presume to know any of that for certain, but I do suspect it based on things I am observing as well as the timing of all of this. But I also think that if that is the case, I also suspect that pressure from the OW may also be based on some doubts and concerns that OW is having -- and I don't think those have anything to do with me. In other words, I think there is more going on with this entire situation than my W realizes, and I think she is in for a rude awakening at some point when real life doesn't match the fantasy of what she thinks life will be like when I am out of the house.
In a nutshell... it's MLC and it's just craziness...
Me 48, Her 50 (Same-Sex Couple) 3 Children Together: 9.5 years before BD BD: Week of 10/27/14 ExW started EA w OW 9/2014 ExW married OW 12/2015
