Pyrite: Eye of the storm?

[Pyrite]

"but her agenda is NOT in the children best interests at all."

That's from YOUR POV. What YOU think is strictly your OPINION which you have a right to just as much as she does. That's why you have to learn how to validate.

You validate the fact that she has a right to feel the way she does as much as you do. Zeus is doing an excellent job at calling you out on your BS. You're not getting it which is why your W continues to treat you the way she does.

hi Mr Bond, I too am grateful for being called out on my BS, but this is different from defending her. And it is my POV, but also child psychologists. Explain to me exactly how introducing her new partner into their lives as the constant male figure who has replaced Daddy is good for the children.

it is good for her. The children ARE confused. what does this teach them about relationships? Their relationship wit their father? As co-parents how is she encouraging a business like trust relationship with me?

To my 4 year old she thinks i just have to buy mummy a better present than her new best friend, her words.

I wish that if I changed, she would treat me or see me as different. Alas I suspect I am destined to be in the same boat as Zeus on this one. It is true, even talking to her Mother, that whilst I have visibly settled a lot since BD and the aftermath, W has not. She is still just as angry. 1 reason is that the M is still logistically holding her back. it will be months before we can sever financial ties, custody issues, relocation etc. So I think realistically months before she starts to really enjoy new life that ATM she is still blaming me for why she can't enjoy it. Then it will be another X months, house sold, D, before she MIGHT see a different me.

i was when I started here very enthusiastic about saving the M (by changing myself). but i am gradually losing my enthusiasm for saving the M. it just doesn't seem to be in the cards. i'm sure everyone has felt this hoplessness. maybe this is another reason i can't NOT mention HER in the same breath every time i speak.