Pyrite: Eye of the storm?

[Zues126]

And BTW- my STBX was and is neurotically controlling about parenting. She devoted 100% of her energy into being a mother and withdrew from being a wife. She has VIDEO CAMERAS in every room so she can monitor the kids at all times. She is extremely overprotective. I felt like I couldn't be a dad because she wouldn't let me in. And even my DB coach thinks she may have some type of borderline personality issues and has an unhealthy relationship with the kids because she is using them for their love and to play "good mom" for recognition/admiration from others, and she's more concerned on using them to meet her needs than she is on meeting theirs.

HOWEVER!!! While I'm dimly aware of that, I honestly don't give it much time. It's about as relevant as whether or not Justin Bieber likes Broccoli or not. It has NOTHING TO DO with your journey. Great, my STBX is a flawed human that makes mistakes. So what? I am too. I need to work on MY mistakes. And the biggest mistake is FOCUSING ON HER MISTAKES!!!

This idea that your STBX is so crazy it somehow changes this pricipal and we just don't understand it has to go. We get it. But you have to let go of monitoring/judging her behavior. That's why we're saying you're controlling. People that aren't controlling don't do this. You do it so innately you can't even see you're doing it. Maybe it's like breathing, you don't know another way to operate? I'm not attacking Py, just curious why this is such a hang up.