Matt - On Saturday I found a letter from the IRS in the post! I laughed and thought of you as I opened it. Letters from the IRS aren't typically a good thing. H has been negligent in getting taxes filed, so last year I stepped up to sort out the mess. It seems anything with a process around it becomes a point of procrastination for H.

Maybe there is a trend to the tax avoidance and midlife crisis! smile

Your W probably realises this is her last big connection with you. She is not interested in being agreeable, nor does she care about consequences. It is the last chance she has to "show you" her independence. She might actually gain more by messing up the taxes - she keeps you engaged with her. Keep pushing to get the IRS stuff resolved. A bit more debt may be worth it to get your emotional space from her.

H: 48 Me: 47
Married: 19 yrs T: 20 yrs
2 teen-Ds and S
H-MLC (started 2012) and H-Unemployed (11/2014)
D-Bomb: 2/2015
H left country but hasn't moved out: 7/2015
I filed: 7/2015