Separated Therapy and No Change

[skhdive]

For me it started this summer with him being distant,
angry at me and my son and just in general even his mother asked what was wrong with him and he started listening to country music and running which he has never done
and then I found out he was texting this OW he said it was nothing just friends and when I asked he said he would stop and he was sorry and he knew it wasn't right.

I think he did stop but I also discovered that he was texting a couple other women from his work after that which he says are just friends.

He is obsessed with his body (he is weightlifter) thinks he is losing his muscle, we fought every day until he moved out because he did not want to talk about our relationship,
says I didn't love him, don't respect him, ask too many questions, in his face etc says when he sees me he feels angry and loves me but not sure it is the right way, has no feelings for me, that our marriage is full of problems, none of which our therapist can get him to name except he feels controlled by me his mother and other people.

He seems depressed at times says he can't sleep at night, doesn't want to talk and when asked what he wants out of our marriage he is not sure.

I have tried to be nice, not ask questions (I do ask questions in past because he would come home and give big sigh and then sit down so I would ask what is wrong and then he would get mad).
I have thought someone else or MLC or both.

I have asked him if there is anyone else and if so just tell me so we won't be wasting all this time on therapy and making it so painful on us both. He fanatically denies anyone else. Any suggestions.