I couldn't remember what your WAW's issues were with you during the M. I just reread your entire thread and still don't really know.
The first few pages were vague references to you not always treating her the best, that she was unhappy because you were also unhappy with her (followed by why), that you were potentially a WAS at one point, that you made changes recently and fixed things but it didn't matter. I read about your WAW's intimacy issues, childhood problems, lack of effort with daily life, focus on the children, sloppiness, and lack of notice for dropping the bomb. But nothing you really did wrong stands out in my memory banks.
The next few pages were you arguing with Mr. Bond.
When people make a comment like the one you just made and the many like it you've made, they typically are looking for people to say "oh, no, your WAW will come around". Or for sympathy.
Bad news. Sympathy won't get her back. And she won't come around if she believes she'll be coming back to the same man and the same M.
If you have made all the changes you can then I think you'd better accept the D as real, and may want to plan on staying single for a long time.
If that doesn't appeal to you, why not take this opportunity to start over and tell us why your W is actually leaving you. Pretend your the lawyer, we're the jury, and you have to make your best case on why she should never want to be M to you...how would you present that?
We want to see you save your M but you have to start walking that path. It's not too late but time does matter. Do this in five years from now and it will be. But like the saying goes, "the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the second best time is now". Can you take this on?
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
