gan 6 - return to human be-ing

[Zelda09]

Ah. Yes. It can feel dismal looking out at the future.

I know I have a few friends who are in this demographic - one or two that are relentlessly picky, quick to find something wrong with every male, hearts closed hard. They have come out of heart break, also.

The key words here in your study are 'most' - look at this forum! There are plenty of men here who have a lot to offer who also got their hearts broken. Divorced men, men who've been single all their life - they're all out there and not all losers, lol.

And you my friend - well, you're a world traveler who I believe will come out of this strong and with a heart open. Don't give up on yourself. I am also scared, and I know what it feels like to be this age thinking, "now what?"

But there was a special moment on my way home (brief hijack, warning) I pulled over and started bawling my eyes out, realizing how things really could never be the same again, how I was truly done, just tremendous emotion. And then - my FB messenger started going off with a friend of a friend asking for me to give him lessons. So out of the blue. I'll admit that in all of my thoughts of the future w/o H, this dude is the first face I picture - he's funny, hot, driven, seems genuinely at home in his own skin, and I love the way I feel around him the few times we've ran into each other socially - I laugh so easily and he has such a bright and kind spirit. I've imagined in my darkest times in DR that this dude is the kind of person I want to draw toward me when I am ready. (I'm no where near ready.) But it was incredible, as I was crying tears of letting go, after all afternoon reading articles about what it is to be with someone who 100% wants you - that at that moment I had the randomest contact from him.

I share this because I think the universe does really give back to us what we choose to manifest, and the signs will be there, the doors will open when we are ready to close other rooms.

I believe in you, Gan! You have done the kind of introspection most people barely touch on, and I believe you'll be richly rewarded in happiness for the future. May you never have another year of waiting on one foot.

It strikes me that in a lot of these situations where piecing was successful, the LBS truly gave up and dropped the rope. Not all of our WAS return even with a rope dropped, that is a certainty. Try to understand nothing you do or don't do will make your H return to you, and if he does, it's his choice alone - and yours finally, if you still want him if that should ever happen.

You did all you could. Go forth and prosper! Be radiant.