"but i really dont think I'm dwelling on this point at all. it is not something I expect her to even change. It would be nice if she was more mindful of it, but it is NOT a condition or anything."
First of all, you're going to have to learn what saying the word 'but' means when you're communicating with your W or others. When you say "but", it negates and invalidates everything you said before it.
AND the fact that you say things like "it would be nice if she was more mindful of it" shows that you're STILL focussing on her faults.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.