Focused on Me and My Son 2

[Sherman333]

I did something stupid. I've already chastised myself and so has the BIL/SIL. But advice would be welcome.

I got into a discussion with a neighbor a day or so back about taking care of my dog while I'm away from home.

My STBXW had posted about the divorce on facebook and all the neighbors know about it. We got into a brief discussion about what went wrong... I told what I did to contribute to the marriage, how I withdrew because of the crazy mood swings, personal attacks, etc. I even said hell... her brother thinks she might be bipolar... That was stupid #1 and I let my tongue run away. Dumbest thing I've done in a LONG time.

Well this neighbor told another neighbor and it got back to the STBXW. She flipped this morning. It was beyond not pleasant.

She said it was normal for a person to have emotional highs/lows during the decision making process for Divorce... I told her it's been going on for years, not just the past few months. I do think she needs treatment, but this is so not the way to do it...

Well during the course of the discussion this morning I started defending the possibility and pointing out all the signs... Including how she threatened her own son... How she was going to make Disney such a miserable experience that all he associates with the word... She started gaslighting (say she never said that) and I let slip about the tape (keep in mind I've suspected she's known for a while, but I confirmed it... stupid #2).

She's back to talking about taking our Son again (but only talking to him quietly).

She did throw out with my son present (he shot up to the master bedroom once she really started yelling.

• she can't trust me anymore
• that I'm a horrible nasty person
• she never wants to talk to me again
• that there's no possibility of us reconciling ever (I'm ok with this).
• she can't be at the house anymore as she's so embarrassed about neighbors know about the boss and that I mentioned bipolar
• that I can be sued for this (doubtful as I that BIL though she was bipolar)
• etc. etc.

I mentioned the tape in a fit of anger... I've tried to keep the anger controlled through this entire situation and it got the best of me this morning... it was even a bit self-righteous. Now I'm berating myself for it. But at least she knows I'm not just taking everything lying down, that I'm willing to fight and have been gathering the ammo... but still.

As for the neighbor... I guess it was sympathy seeking... I shouldn't have done that either.

In this I've been setting things up in my favor and just screwed things a bit... I still have more cards but they're not nearly as good.

The BIL says I've unleashed and fed the beast. We'll see.

Bright points that might come out of this though... she'll quit talking to me altogether and move out ASAP.

But I know as of last night, she's looking at going to a 1 bedroom flat, so doesn't have room for all the furniture or my son's stuff. She still might try to take him though.

I also don't think she'll tell too many people about the recordings, except maybe her attorney. She won't want them to wonder too much what's on them. I'm sure she's freaking out a little about what on them as well.

I've been feeling like I have to puke all morning. :P