Hi Jim and RD, thanks for posting. Yes, the Relate thing is a possible support group for people affected by infidelity. It would be similar to the group I went to in London. Need to do a bit more work before I meet with them on Thursday, but they seem interested and I'm happy to help with setting up. I'll keep you posted.
Lovely weather again here. Drove up to meet my sister near Manchester for some lunch with her, niece and nephew - very nice day. Working tomorrow and planning to go to Ceroc again in the evening.
Still nothing from H. And THB, I'm enjoying the peace and quiet for now. I suspect when H is back, he'll want to move forward with things, so that may be more stressful again - but for now it's good to know that he's away and I'm unlikely to hear anything for a little while....
Hope you guys are having a good day. Thanks for your support and encouragement - I really appreciate my 'virtual' friends on this forum. xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Glad you had a good weekend. I have those wistful moments too, so I definitely feel you there. I try to roll with them as best I can. Just keep taking care of Toots. I totally identify with what you said about how it will be stressful when he comes back and I lived through that, so all I know to tell you is take care of yourself and stick to your guns. Rooting for you, my friend!
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Was it you, Toots, who used the analogy of being in the middle of a cyclone? Been through one side, know the other side will pass over at some point but don't know when? I always thought that was a great analogy. Sounds like you are still in the eye of the storm and making the most of it. Good for you.
H 37 Me 36 Together 15 years Married 5 years No kids BD Apr 2014 H moved out 2 Jun 2014
Sorry for not posting for awhile, the kids and I are in the middle of the Mountains of Colorado. WiFi is a luxury here.
So Toots, no mind reading please. You know it's not very good to anticipate any event, much less when it something you can't control and do not have any idea of why your H is dragging himself to take a decision that by the way it should be an easy one if he is not holding anything inside himself.
It is an annoying situation you are at, but don't let your fears to get the best of you. Remember that it is not all done, it's not all finished. It may be well the start of a new cycle.
During the time that you are S from your H, you met your SS and XW twice I think. Maybe SS will talk to him about you, maybe he will tell that he likes you and miss spending more time with you. Who knows, everything is possible.
Congrats on taking good care after your Mom and Dad, it's so amazing that you give so much love for them.
Please, remember always that you are a nice person and deserve good people in your life. You probably had your down moments during your M, you let go and maybe could have done many things better.
But you are 50% responsible, if not less. Your H is also responsible for a dull R that led you here. And he may need to do a lot more thinking than you, since this is the 2nd R that does not work well for him.
Do you have any idea if he is getting some help, like an IC?
It would be great if he could treat himself and see things a little more clear.
Keep being positive, don't forget he fell in love with you once and he still have some if not a lot of that love inside him yet. It's not too late, it will be too late only when you decide it's time to let go and move on.
Hadnt popped in for a few days but had been catching up on your posts. Sounds like H is mulling things over, I think you're completely right to just keep on keeping on.
You know my sitch and I still have to fight the "come on, come on aknowledge what you want to do" feeling even talking with w frequently, sometimes its like a tug on your emotions to have a clear idea if they want that direction or not. Being able to say, ok we'll see what happens there meantime I'm getting on with..... is the key it seems, sometimes I do it better than others you seem to be very good at it with the positive way you channel your energies keep on keeping tootling
Hope all is well and you've had some of this nice weather, we have a bit of cloud down here today but mostly nice sunshine.
Take it easy Toots
Edz
M:44, W:46, S:10 M 13 years, T 15 BD:23/7/2014 W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014 My new place: 21/11/2014 W/S back to flat 22/11/2014 W coming closer, talking 4/2015 Piecing 5/2015 Moving in again 6/2015
Dawn, thanks for your kind comments. It helps to know someone feels the same way Gan - yes that was me. Glad you liked that one!
Pink, I'm glad to hear from you - I was getting a little concerned there sister. Edz, thank you. I'm not sure if H is mulling over, or avoidant, or just forgot, or just enjoying the holiday.....or whatever else. Best not to wonder and keep on as you say. I try to just keep the 'forward' button pressed. Thanks for saying I seem good at it. I don't always feel good at it. Maybe I just try to present myself that way.
Woke up a bit out of sorts this morning. I may be a bit worried about new Ceroc class, the Relate thing tomorrow, H back soon. I'm not sure. But I feel a bit unsettled and jittery somehow. No doubt it will pass.
Well, the job has been advertised today, so I need to get on with my application...
Have a good afternoon my friends....:-)
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
Hi Toots , best of luck with application. I think we all portray strength at times but you found out about OW and were gone. That takes huge strength and real character. I'm sure you don't always feel the strength but from the outside looking in , it's there to see. If you didn't wonder or worry about your H you would have truly detached and some other lucky guy would have the pleasure of having you in his life It might not mean much but knowing there are ladies like you Out there gives me great hope of being happy again thanks for being Ttoots. Take care. Rd. xx
