Complex #7 - the green(-card) mile

[Complex]

OLD THREAD

First of all hanks to all my listeners and supporters.

There was not a lot of change in my thread recently:

- In home separation still in place. W still stressed by living situation, but happy that we are getting along well.

- Also getting along with her family well, in a lot of touch with them

- Right now I just live my life. The way I think it is ok.

- Still doing IC, lot of GAL stuff, feels like I pretty much have my own life now.

- W doing kind of the same, but isn't going out much or extensively. Her "enabling friend" moved further away too. No idea if she talks to OM still. Status 2 weeks ago was no.

- Waiting on my greencard, which will eventually be the day things will progress, which means W will start to take legal steps. She told me she wants to move on with her life.
So I am kind of anxious about what is going to happen next. She made herself clear a couple weeks ago, since then no talking about it.

- I am less reactive, but not very strategical right now either. Just friendly with W, doing my own thing. Feels a little bit too easy at the moment. And I also feel reconciliation is so far away that is is hard to imagine at the moment, especially because I know what I want from my R and my life, which would require a good amount of work for W, and I do not see this happening.

- Starsky mentioned a very good point. I don't have the feeling right now that W has to fear losing me . On one hand it might feel things will be "easier" for her in the end since I am not "fighting" it and not trying to "pursue" or lecture her anymore. On the other hand since we are friendly with each other she might feel that I still like her and won't cooperate in the end again, like I did before.

Thing is, I do not want to be her friend, this will be almost impossible for me. I won't be able to move on like that, neither do I not want to get hurt that way.

I would be glad for some advice on this. What can I do to show her she will lose me for good?