The "bomb" that was dropped on H by me is no longer an issue. I won't go into details, there were emotions involved, things to think about, decisions to be made and reality. This morning mother nature took her course. The reality is I am no longer young, H is no longer young, responsibility for our actions finally sets in. End of subject.
I had to work last night, S went to my parents. Left a message with H where I was and where S was and that I would see him later. Hadn't heard from H all day. Picked up S, drove home and in my mind I was wondering if H would be home/not be home. Approaching house, no lights on no H. Oh well. Pulled into the garage, closed the garage door, the garage door closes and then starts opening. It's H. H came into the house, I asked him where he was and he wouldn't say. H immediately headed for the bathroom, S and I headed down stairs to watch TV. H came down a bit later..H was very quiet. We watched TV for a bit, H went to bed I sat up and read/prayed for H and went to bed.
This morning it was like H couldn't hear a darn thing. S4 was a terror all morning. I was trying to take a shower, S4 was messing around in the bathroom, I called H a few times to get S out of the bathroom, no response. S was doing all kinds of naughty things and it was like H didn't hear anything at all. Just sat on the couch reading the newspaper, listening to country music on TV, up loud!! I just wanted to scream at H to help out!!
I don't know if H was waiting for me to flip out, throw him out--which is what I wanted to do or what he was thinking. H was in a zone.
H is now at a family meeting to determine if his parents should continue to live alone or what should be done. They are both not taking care of each other. His mom broke her foot from just getting out of her chair. She's an alcoholic, who's no longer drinking as of a year ago and her bones are like pretzels. H's mom hasn't been happy for years, she just sits in her chair, doesn't want to go anywhere for very log. From there H is going to watch a race and basketball game at a bar, then to the hockey game tonight.
I am taking full responsibility for our S, have all weekend. H just does what he wants to. This weekend it is bothering me as my S is being a TERROR!!! ARgggghhhh!
I have to work again later this afternoon. So will go to my parents. I am also going to be very busy at work this week.
This coming weekend I will make no plans except with my H. I think I'm going to ask him to keep the whole weekend open so that him and I can spend some time together.
Vinlad--you are very right on about H after reading the depression stage and thinking back over the last two months as an outsider, H is in depression. Withdrawl? H's face shows no emotions, looks blank.
This whole thing is amazing when I step back and look.
I am doing amazingly well considering all that's going on and I will continue to go on as I have been. For life is good and whether we like what happens or not, it's called life.
H takes everything so personally, thinks everything "happens" to him, is about him, doesn't think about anybody else, just himself. I even point it out to him once in awhile by saying "why do you think it's just about you?" H just doesn't get it.
