The lawyers finished the settlement agreement today and I'm signing tomorrow. Then it will be off to STBX's attorney and another big check mark crossed off my moving-forward list.
We met the listing agent for the house. She was so dynamic and she spoke STBX's language so I didn't have to sell it at all. That was good.
D12 was quite surly about it but -- MIRACLE! -- she actually told (snarled) her issue to me and I was able to answer it. She started making it all my fault and so I said, "I understand you are upset. I'm not too happy either. Please understand, this isn't what I want, but I need you to not put me in the position of speaking against your dad." She stopped giving me grief. Later I said that I promised that if she had any questions about anything that I would be as honest as I could. Then I just left it. She's still pretty snarly but she dialed it back enough that I could overlook it.
STBX stopped in the middle of the house tour to send a text. The look on his face suggests to this mind-reading lady that he was pushing off a date with his girlfriend (who I believe I've identified). I don't know this to be true, but I do believe it to be true. Which is useful in that I realized... I've moved into a phase of caring less than I did. And if he has "replaced" me with a new girlfriend, well, that says way more about him than about me. Because if he still wants a relationship but he isn't willing to be honest enough with me to get his needs met (or generous enough to meet mine, or confident enough to be "uncomfortable" co-running family business...), then swapping me out for Woman 2.0 (2.3? 4.2? The 6?) isn't going to get him the happily ever after. I'm not the Flaw In The Plan.
And I stood there this evening and I looked him full in the face, and the hole in my heart seemed smaller. A LOT smaller. And he seemed less desirable and I'm interested in my future.
It is nice to think I'm finally beginning to grow up.
Me42, H40 D12, S8, S7 A revealed: 7/13 Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15
