Alpha One, Alpha All #

[alpha99]

Argh I just wrote a long post but the computer crashed. I'll keep this one shortish.

Toots,

Happy Easter. Thanks for your comments. I know you're right. I've got to work on not judging W. I hope I've found my DBing groove. I think you're touching on detachment if I'm still getting enthused over W's change in behaviour. I do suffer from frustration but it is mainly fleeting. I believe I'm patient enough to see this through, that's not to say I don't get impatient at times.

Luis,

Thanks for your post! Happy Easter. You make good, concise comments regarding rebuilding Rs and time healing wounds. I hope that turns out to be the case.

W called me just before to arrange child care over the next few days. As the phone rang and I saw it was her calling, I thought to myself, answer it (it's Easter), be upbeat and happy sounding, try and find something to agree on - anything - and finally end the call first.

I did all of that. Firstly I spoke to the kids. They were excited with having received more eggs throughout the day. S6 came on the phone and I could hear him asking W if he could ask me something. It turns out he wants to share his favourite Easter eggs with me. It's good to know I'm not forgotten by the kids when I'm not there.

W was friendly throughout. After speaking to the kids we spoke for a moment or two. I made a comment about how the kids sounded like they'd had a good Easter. She agreed. She said she hadn't given them too many eggs so that they didn't get sick. Normally, at this point, I would lecture on how too much chocolate is bad for them etc. This time however I just agreed that she was doing a good thing. I was upbeat throughout. I ended the call first.

I have the kids all day Tuesday and overnight. Probably later in the week too for the odd night here and there. I feel quite happy with myself at the moment. Maybe a page hasn't turned in our R, but I certainly feel a change in myself. As for GAL activities, I have the following planned as a minimum:

Go to the gym three times this week.
Take up offer of staying over one night at relatives this week.
Go to Italian meet up.
Continue job writing hobby.
Go to planned comedy meetup event in the next week or so.
Continue taking regular walks around local park.
Contact old friends to plan something for this week.
Start work again tomorrow.

There will of course be plenty of difficulties ahead but I feel I'm in a much better place emotionally to deal with them from now on.