Lou, We all have little "slips" when it comes to our mlcing spouses and the contact we have w/them. The point is to not allow the "slips" to bring you down and keep you down.
I'm so happy that your girlfriends continue to give you pep talks. You need them in your life and yes, you are loved by many people, not just in the real world, but here as well. They are absolutely correct in the fact that you've come a long way in such a short amount of time. This path is not an easy one, but you've managed to find what works best for you and you've been navigating your journey in a very classy way. Don't allow your h to take away your sparkle. He's just not worth it at the moment.
I'm glad that you've gotten full time employment. It may not be what you want, but at least it will pay the bills until you can find something better. Take your frustrations out on cleaning the rooms.
Continue to keep the focus on you and your sons. Lou, I think you've been doing a bang up job of keeping things together. Don't ever allow anyone to take your sparkle away.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
