Confused 4

[Joe46]

Tonight I am just a tad hurt. I know I shouldn't be, but I am. My detaching has gone well the past few days. Yesterday and today, W seemed different. Seemed like her old self. We even joked around some this afternoon. I did not read much into it. I know there are ups and downs. She does so much better when she is around her friends here in town. When we do things with the kids and the school. Or when she just visits with other people here in town. Her whole attitude changes into the person I used to know. I am thank full for the little things. I really think the other girls she works with influence her some. When she visits the women around town, it is a normal life. When she starts her job, it is her fantasy world. Tonight was the first time I have seen her say she was not ready to work.

So anyway after having a couple good days, I have been practicing my things I need to work on. One was my listening skills and the other was just validating and just trying to be a more attractive person to my W. I think some of it helped. I noticed she has been watching me a little more lately. Has been watching me when I am texting to. Kinda like she is wondering who I am texting. She has not done that before. We have been very friendly the past 2 days. She talked to me about her mom some tonight. Her mom has Parkinson's. She is getting worse. Can't dress herself and get around the house very well. She is going to need a special bed. I could see how upset my wife was tonight. I listened and sympathized with her. She talked about how she is going to have to go help her after her surgery and that she is planning to take the kids to see her for a couple weeks this summer. With her health, it is good she see's her grandkids. She almost acted like she wanted me to come when she goes with the kids. Or was waiting for me to say something. I did not say anything, just said sounds good.

So here is my dilemma! I would appreciate any advice on how to act in regards to this stuff. The only thing I did was I told her how sorry I was that her mom was going through this and that I was sorry her health was getting worse. She gave me a hug and thanked me. I am trying to put my feelings aside right now. The hard part is I know she is still lying about her job. She has told me in the past that when she main dispatches that she can not take calls. Well tonight she made a point to let me know she was main. When I was up hiding Easter eggs, I heard different. It hurts real bad to hear her with that fake voice making those noises from that room. But with her mom and her health and what she is going through I just have to detach from it. I don't know how she is going to keep this job and go back and forth helping her mother.