Hey BW welcome to the boards. It is a place filled with great people. What caught my eye was the "yeller" thing. I was a yeller too. We didnt argue often. Sometimes for a couple of years all was good. But I behaved much like you at times. It wasnt that I wanted to be right. I wanted to be heard? Well she wasnt deaf. So what was my need to raise my voice and be condescending? Many in here have asked me that since I joined. I think about it often.
One thought. I dont like conflict. In order for me to deal with a conflict I made myself angry. It made it easier to deal with the unpleasant truths. Yes you read that correct. I made myself angry. No one makes you angry but yourself.
Yes upbringing has a lot to do withit. Both my parents screamed and through things at eacother. No way to have a good M like that.
So. Why would your W want to return to a M where she will be "yelled" at. How can she trust that your changes will be ever lasting?
Do post often. It really helped understand me. Im still looking at me. It is ok to be angry. But it is how you express that anger without wanting to hurt someone.
GAL a lot my friend
M 53 D 20 Separated 6/22/11 moved out 10/24 Together 26 yrs Married 16 W Filed for D 7/21/11 Served 9/6/11 D final 8/28/12
“Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be.”
