I totally understand the inappropriate talk and comments. How is it they think they can say things and it not be reflection on them?
My H says things about friends and family, then refuses to talk to them and can't get it that he is the one spouting opinions. He even remarks about other people having affairs and how wrong it is. Never ever incluing himself in those comments.
It just amazes me. Guess it is part of the MLC syndrome.
When you can't make a decision because you are torn between your heart and your head, listen to the half with the brain.