Letting go Qs

[Kramer]

Ok, I need to vent a little. I saw and retained a lawyer, and they are sending my response to dissolution to my wife today. I know this needs to be done to protect myself. Her actions have been consistent:

She does not love me any more.
She has moved into her own place and our accounts are all separate.
She is still with OM, and seems happy.
She filed divorce 1 week after I discovered affair.
She served me 2 weeks ago.
She has refused counseling or mediation.
She has refused to discuss specifics of why she left, only saying that she has been unhappy for years.

The reality in front of me is quite obvious. So why do I feel so bad? I had accepted my reality and have been GAL and going to IC. I have been mostly dark, other than responding succinctly to financial and legal questions.

Today I feel sad, and angry. Mostly angry. Angry that she never even tried to fix things. Angry that she seems happy and I feel so alone. Angry that she wasn't strong enough to resist affair and fight for us. Angry that I will never be one of those older couples holding hands and celebrating 30 years of marriage. I feel cheated. I feel like a failure.

I know what I need to do. I know that I can only facilitate my own changes. I know that I will be better off...eventually.

I,m

I'm just upset.