Go back and read through your threads. You have received all the advice you need to move very far down the road you say you want to be on, you have just lacked the resolve to actually follow that advice. Nothing else will change until you accept reality for what it is and make the commitment to YOURSELF that the time is NOW.

There are no magic words. You have to decide and commit.

Best of luck to you.

-PM

M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.