Need Help 3

[errod]

First thing I need to do is stop protecting W. I really have been keeping everything in. I do not go out because I didn't want people to notice us not together or even tell family or close friends about the situation, in hopes that everything would work out and no one would feel different about her. But in protecting her I was killing myself.

Secondly I have to GAL, I need to do what makes me happy at that moment.

I have to make sure all D14's needs are being met because she is not taking any of this well.

I need this D to go through quickly now because as of right now she has me at her mercy financially. She can suffocate me at anytime.

The hard part is we do have a very active D14, W and I are going to be intertwined and have to see each other multiple times a week. If not everyday.

Another thing is she knows D14 wants to live with me 100%, so I don't know what she will do to try to prevent that. I worry about D14's safety when she is there, but when I talked to my attorney he said I need to fix myself before I can go and battle her to get full custody. That is the main reason I am getting counseling, so I can be totally capable to take care of D14.

I will never truly get over my W. You don't start with someone at 17 and make it 19 years and are ever able to fully stop loving them. Yes I will be able to go on with life and even live a happy life, but there is a scar that will never go away.