We basically had it out last night. She had put me down in front of our neighbour and I asked her later not to do that. That opened her up, as well as opening up a can of worms. W got mad and stopped talking. Later she came home.
I asked to see W's phone. She said no. I asked what are you hiding. She said "nothing". Then show me your phone. No, you've invaded my privacy in the past. You started this A Feb 2013. No. I have proof - it was an EA at that point but still an A. You drove me to it. You've been lying to me ever since. There is no trust here. Then why do you still want me? Because I love you - you were a great person. I believe we can fix this.
Ugh. This ^^^^ sums up your entire problem with your current dynamic Peter. As I've posted many, many times, all infidelity is bad but it's REALLY bad when it's the wife who is cheating, the husband knows, and the wife knows that he knows. And then she sees that he's STILL pursuing her, regardless.
You may still love her, but I can assure you that she sees this whole exchange as a toxic combination of control and neediness. NOT attractive.
