Hi Depress, Just read through your thread. I know how hard this is for you. I am pretty much on my own 60% of the time with two small children. Take care of yourself, take time for yourself, try to focus on the kids and having fun with them. Be facetious, as my sister likes to say--indoor picnics, impromptu parties/playdates, movie nights, games--anything to get your mind off of the situation at hand and create a fun, loving, stable environment for your kids. Your husband isn't there right now. You are the stable adult in their lives and the person they are looking to for comfort and security. Embrace that role and do all the things you might not have been able to do when your H was there. Find a fun TV show you've always wanted to watch and binge your heart out after the kids are in bed. Trust me, it sounds lame but it's a great distraction from all of this! And GAL your heart out too--not for him, but for you.
On the zoloft--STICK WITH IT, please! You have to give the medicine time to kick in. A few years before BD, after having my first daughter, I was given zoloft and I hated the way it made me feel too. I was like, really? I'm getting up with a baby at night and taking a drug that's making me feel more tired? Nope! And I stupidly quit taking it. Then my depression got worse and worse and after my second daughter was born I went on it again and stuck with the 6-8 week adjustment period and boom! I felt better than I had in years. I felt AWESOME! More energy even too, which I didn't expect! Unfortunately by then it was too late and my husband had had it with the depression and was done, but I still think zoloft is a miracle drug. If it does end up not working for you though, try something else, but you have to give meds a "break-in" period and not give up on them too quickly.
Please hang in there and keep posting (I'm terrible myself about posting). Love those kids and let them know you're there for them no matter what and enjoy them. I hate this situation but I do love my kids and I'll be darned if my H's leaving is going to make me miss out on these precious, fleeting years with them!!! Took me quite a while to get to this point!
Stay strong, Lorelai
Me: 38 H: 43 Kids: 2,4 T10 M6 BD: 1/14 11/14: H moves out
